Megan Barton-Hanson reveals that she had suicidal thoughts as she opens up to fans about her mental health

Megan Barton-Hanson has revealed that she has suicidal thoughts as she opened up to fans about her mental health.

The Love Island star was praised by fans for her openness and many applauded the 24-year-old for telling her story to thousands.

“A lot of People cant get their heads around why if I was so depressed and suffering from anxiety I would go on a reality show. For me it’s was a make or brake moment. Id suffered on and off with mental health problems since my teens,” she explained on Instagram.

 

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Today is world Mental health Day. I’ve put writing this off all day as depression and anxiety are still pretty raw for me and part of who I am. Mental health issues are more common than ever especially with the increased use of social media and the resulting feelings of inadequacy. It’s funny because a lot of the time it’s the people that appear strongest on the outside that can also be the ones suffering the most on the inside. You just don’t know what they are dealing with on a daily basis. It doesn’t seem like that long ago that it took so much just to get the mental strength for me to get out of bed and face the world each morning. A lot of People cant get their heads around why if I was so depressed and suffering from anxiety I would go on a reality show. For me it’s was a make or brake moment. Id suffered on and off with mental health problems since my teens. At the end of 2017/early 2018 was probably the lowest I’d ever felt. There were a few times that I just didn’t want to wake up, I had suicidal thoughts, and had even gone to my mum sobbing about what I should do as I didn’t want to be alive anymore. My way of coping was putting on a persona for social media, partying, earning money and buying half of Harrods! None of it helped, maybe for 5 mins it distracted me from what was going on inside but as soon as I was back in my flat on my own the negative thoughts and emotions would return. I was sad and lonely with it, my own mind working against me. I did some therapy and that helped me by providing techniques for coping in moments of crisis. I’m so lucky that the Love Island opportunity arrived when it did. I didn’t realise at the time what the impact of being away from it all in the villa would have on my mental state. I thought it would make me famous and I would earn lots of money and that would bring me happiness but actually it was more like a rehab retreat for me stripping everything back and forcing me to see what was most important in my life. Meeting people and experiencing them loving me not for the persona I was presenting online gave me strength and made me realise that I need to love myself more. (Continues in comments)

A post shared by Megan Barton-Hanson (@meganbartonhanson_) on Oct 10, 2018 at 1:38pm PDT

“At the end of 2017/early 2018 was probably the lowest I’d ever felt. There were a few times that I just didn’t want to wake up, I had suicidal thoughts, and had even gone to my mum sobbing about what I should do as I didn’t want to be alive anymore,” she continued.

Megan went on to describe how she thought putting on a persona for social media would make her feel better, but that she would still be “sad and lonely” at the end of the day.

The reality star told fans that she then went to therapy and found out ways to cope “in moments of crisis” before she appeared on Love Island.

Megan told fans that the show helped her to clear her thoughts: “It was more like a rehab retreat for me stripping everything back and forcing me to see what was most important in my life.”

“I’m far from fixed and still have moments but when I do I let someone know, I talk it through, I tell myself that although in this moment I feel weak it will pass,” she finished.

Fans were quick to fill the comments section with messages of support for Megan and many praised her for being so open with her followers.

“wow so much love for you and this post ! ❤️❤️” one fan said, while another wrote: “That is so well put ❤️ it hits the nail on the head, well done xx”.