Irish influencer Kiki Nugent has opened up about her split from her fiancé Craig O’Sullivan.
The personal trainer, who is known by her social media handle Kiki Fit, announced her engagement in June – after moving to Dubai with Craig in January.
But just last month, the 25-year-old confirmed she and Craig were no longer together, and she returned home to Ireland.
Speaking on the latest episode of the Sinead Says podcast, Kiki said: “I never had a breakup – this was my first ever relationship, my first ever boyfriend, and it was all so public. So for me, the main thing was just looking after my mental health from the start.”
“What happened with me is I moved back into my parent’s house, and I lay in bed for about six weeks. I’m not going to sugarcoat it – I lay in my bed, I slept with my mom and I ate pizza. It was pretty awful. It was a really really bad time in my life.”
“When I was coming back to Ireland, I was distraught, I was so upset… I was sitting in Amsterdam airport crying and thinking ‘I just need to pull myself together.'”
Kiki revealed she then got herself a therapist to help her deal with her breakup.
She said: “I was in a relationship for years – that’s all I knew. So it was such a shellshock to me when I was like, ‘Oh my god, I’m back at home living with my parents.'”
“I doubted my entire existence [after the breakup]. I literally couldn’t post on Instagram, I couldn’t do my job, I couldn’t do anything because I was like ‘I am a piece of s***.’ I felt so awful… I’d never felt so low in myself.”
Kiki continued: “I was 100% co-dependent, it was my first relationship. I didn’t know how to love myself, they don’t teach you this in school – how to be really really happy with yourself.”
“It takes you a while to breakup with the person because of that terrifying feeling of being by yourself and not being loved, and having this validation with your partner.”
“The point where I was like ‘Ok I’m going to leave’, I had to break my own heart, because I knew what I deserved and I knew where I wanted my life to go, so I had to be like no and put the blinkers on and leave it. It is really hard, but once you break that attachment to the person it’s not that bad.”
Speaking about having a relationship in the public eye, Kiki said: “It was tough, it was heart wrenchingly hard being on Instagram and people wanting answers… It was honestly one of the hardest parts of my life.”
The fitness blogger is focusing on herself in the new year, and recently put a lease down on an apartment in Marbella – where she will be moving to in 2022.
Listen to the full podcast episode here.
