Alexandra Cane has admitted she has battled suicidal thoughts, as she reflected on the past 12 months.
The 29-year-old, who rose to fame on the 2018 series of Love Island, shared her struggles in a candid new Instagram post.
Sharing several photos of herself, Alexandra captioned the post: “WHAT A DIFFERENCE A YEAR MAKES ????.
“This year has honestly been one of the most confusing, testing years of my life (and I think for a lot of others too) but my word has it taught me so many lessons that I will never EVER forget.”
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“This exact date last year I was seriously low and clasping at straws to find ways to get myself feeling better,” she continued.
“To look back at where I was then and where I am now, it’s almost like I’m looking at two different people. Not even just physically, but mentally I know how far I’ve come.”
“I had the worst anxiety, falling asleep thinking about death every night, zero purpose, zero motivation, in denial about my relationship with alcohol, food & most importantly, myself.
“My life has been turned absolutely upside down – and for the better. All I wanted to do was strive to be the best version of myself. It’s been hard – I won’t sugarcoat it. The maintenance has been the hardest part,” she wrote.
“Learning to trust myself whilst being in lockdown with minimal distractions, moving away from home, sick family members, wanting to raid the cupboard out of boredom, lack of human connection…”
“Constantly having to remind myself WHY I started. Eventually the new habits I’d made have become a LIFESTYLE and I’m so proud of the person I’ve become.”
“The fact I’m able to inspire others achieve the best version of themselves just fills me with so much joy & so incredibly rewarding – it’s the best part,” Alexandra said.
“It’s ok not to have everything figured out… just taking that first step is what matters. Having the courage to step outside your comfort zone might be the best step you’ll ever take!!!”
“It’s taken a lot of graft, patience, learning, understanding, trust, strength. But ultimately, the end goal has been worth every second. I am only just getting started. I’m not perfect, I never will be. But I will always give my best. And that’s good enough for me.”
“Once you find out your ‘why’ things become a little clearer. Believe that you can. Trust yourself. Commit to yourself. YOU DESERVE IT!
“I can’t wait to continue this journey with you and give you everything I’ve got – knowledge, workouts, motivation, giggles,” she added.
In a separate post on her Instagram Story, Alexandra told fans: “I used to go to sleep thinking of death every night, my anxiety got so bad I ended up in hospital, I was super reactive to every situation, I would project onto others because I was unhappy and had no purpose.”
On this week’s episode of Goss Chats, Goss.ie CEO Ali Ryan chats with award-winning makeup artist and MRS Glam creator, Michelle Regazolli Stone.Â
The celebrity MUA opens up about the ups and downs of living through the pandemic, and how her makeup range saved her.
#GossChats is sponsored by top Irish aesthetic clinic Haus of JeJuve.
