Christine McGuinness broke down in tears as she revealed the real reason behind her split from her husband Paddy.
The former couple, who share three children – Penelope, Leo and Felicity, called it quits last year after 11 years of marriage.
The TV personalities still live together for the sake of their children – who all have autism and rely on routine.
Speaking in her BBC documentary Unmasking My Autism, Christine – who revealed her autism diagnosis back in November 2021, got candid about her split from Paddy.
The Real Housewives of Cheshire star visited Kings College in London, where doctors explained to her that some women with autism often have the desire to be liked, thus remaining in unhealthy, and sometimes violent relationships.
“So I experienced that.” Christine admitted. “I experienced that a long long time ago and I didn’t speak up.”
“I wonder if I never said it because I was autistic. You know, was it me? Would a neurotypical woman have said something, was it my fault?”
Christine continued: “But yeah, it’s something I experienced when I was a teenager and then when I met my husband that was a time where I felt very safe. And I wonder if hat’s why I stayed in that relationship for 15 years.”
“And I know being a single woman, being a single parent is an extremely vulnerable place to be, and it petrifies me, it absolutely petrifies me but that’s life.”
“Sorry I don’t want to get upset,” the reality star said as she wiped away tears.
When asked by a doctor if she felt more able to leave the relationship after receiving her autism diagnosis, Christine admitted: ““Yeah, because I know that I’ve stayed in a place where I was probably unhappy because it was safe and I don’t like change and ultimately I wanted to keep my family together.”
“I was only 19 when I met Patrick and for the last 15 years my role has been wife and mum,” Christine said.
“When I got diagnosed, I set out on a personal mission to figure out who I was, because I’ve played that many different roles in life and not really knowing which part of it was actually me, or who or which one was mostly me.”
“So I’m clearing out because I literally had a wardrobe full of clothes to wear how I thought I was supposed to look and you’re not actually supposed to look like anything or anyone other than yourself.”
“I’ve also separated with my husband in the process and I’m just, yeah, shedding I suppose, shedding my old identity, trying to figure out what my new one is.”
“Things like my marriage for example, that’s massive,” the mum-of-three continued. “I’ve been with my husband since I was 19-years-old, so I’ve only ever had this one man in my life for 15 years.”
“I can’t imagine living with anybody else, I don’t know what it’s like to date. I can’t remember being single.”
“And I’ve found myself in this position now where I don’t really know what to do with it, but, then I am just going into a new chapter, I suppose, on my own, which is petrifying for someone who doesn’t like change.”
“That is another journey that I’m going to have to figure out how to be single. It’s changed everything.”
Christine continued: “Starting life on my own is scary  – I know I struggle with making decisions and I find paperwork really overwhelming.”
“So I am having to learn to take more responsibility.”
“As hard as it is coming to terms with this new perspective on my life, I’m lucky to have got my diagnosis.”
