Bella Hadid has opened up about her “excruciating and debilitating” mental health struggles.
In a candid interview with WSJ. Magazine, the 25-year-old spoke about her “really depressive episodes” and her anxiety.
When asked by the publication what her secret is to putting together her outfit in the morning, the model explained that she hasn’t had a stylist “in a long time, maybe two years now”.
She said she was “in such a weird place mentally that it was really complicated for me to get out of the house and put an outfit together, especially with the anxiety of [paparazzi] being outside and all that”.
Bella said after learning to deal with her anxiety and other mental health struggles, she learned to embrace her fashion and dress in a way that makes her happy.
The Washington native said: “In the last year, it was really important for me to learn that even if people talk about my style or if they like it or if they don’t, it doesn’t matter, because it’s my style.”
“When I leave the house in the morning, what I think about is: Does this make me happy? Do I feel good in this and do I feel comfortable?”
Bella also explained why she decided to share photos of herself crying on Instagram last November.
She said: “I would have really depressive episodes and my mom or my doctor would ask how I was and instead of having to respond in text, I would just send them a photo.”
“It was the easiest thing for me to do at the time because I was never able to explain how I was feeling.”
“I would just be in excruciating and debilitating mental and physical pain, and I didn’t know why. That was over the past three years. [When I posted them] it was to make sure that anybody that was feeling that way knew it was OK to feel that way.”
“Even though on Instagram things look so beautiful, at the end of the day, we are all cut from the same cloth. I felt like it was just good for me to be able to speak my truth and at some point I wasn’t able to post nice pretty pictures anymore. I was over it.”
Bella said she is doing a lot better now, adding: “I do have good days. Today is a good day. My brain fog is feeling better, I don’t feel depressed. I don’t have as much anxiety as I usually do.”
“But tomorrow I could wake up and [be] the complete opposite. That’s why I get so overwhelmed.”
The model admitted sharing her struggles online “made me less lonely because I had a lot of people that have reached out saying, ‘I feel that way too.'”
“Walking outside, being able to remember there are so many people going through things and have similar patterns to me, it makes me feel better,” she said.
“I don’t know if that’s not what people want on Instagram, and that’s fine. I don’t have to be on Instagram forever. I feel like real is the new real, and that’s what’s important to me.”